One of the hardest things about being a leader is getting the right balance between being authentic and oversharing. On the one hand, you need to show that you’re human if you are to succeed in building enduring relationships with your people. Give too much away, however, and you could possibly harm your professional credibility. So, how can leaders manage the lines between their personal and professional personas?
1. Help junior staff start their careers without a “work persona”
You don’t need to have a work persona as a way to guard against oversharing. “Many people believe they need to adopt a separate ‘business persona’ at work from the point they get their first job,” says Richard Vague, an entrepreneur, investor and author of The Paradox of Debt – A New Path to Prosperity Without Crisis.
He points out that the culture of many organizations can lead to people being formal and cautious in the workplace, for reasons of self-preservation. Nevertheless, he argues that it’s preferable for people to be “more authentic, more fully themselves”, but only as long as the environment is characterized by goodwill and respect. “And a company can only achieve this if the boss exemplifies it,” he adds.
2. Use LinkedIn to create your authentic personal brand
The social media platform offers powerful opportunities to help leaders build their personal brand. If they want to represent themselves authentically, they should not just showcase professional accomplishments, but also share personal anecdotes and insights that reflect their true character, knowledge and experience.
“LinkedIn is not just a digital resume, it’s a space to tell your story,” says Bianca Miller-Cole, co-author of Rich Forever – What They DIDN’T Teach You about Money, Finance & Investments in School. “At the end of the day, people buy from people they know, like and trust. So, does your profile articulate who you really are?”
Engagement is also critical since authenticity is not a one-way street, it’s a dialogue. “Leaders should actively participate in conversations, share their opinions and listen to others,” Miller-Cole advises. This not only humanizes their online persona, but also fosters meaningful connections – while establishing the individual as a thought leader in their space.”
3. Remember that personal situations tell your team a lot about your values
Imagine you receive an urgent family phone call during an important team presentation. You have two choices: do you pick it up or ignore it? “Either choice sends a message to your team,” says Olga Valadon, a corporate empathy expert and the founder of leadership, strategy and culture consultancy Change Aligned. “How you handle this event matters, so don’t underplay it. In that moment your behavior, actions and emotions can either inspire people to follow you or lose their trust in you.”
Valadon argues that when personal situations interfere with work life, leaders should treat them as opportunities for “your team to see another side of you and understand your priorities, values and who you are as a person”. She adds: “Don’t apologize for the interruption, but use it as a talking point with your team, inspiring people with your humanity and building a positive work culture.”
4. Aim for work/life flexibility
As a leader, there might be times where work demands some extra effort. Occasionally, you might have to trade in some free time for a project that just has to be finished. But there will also be times in your life where you should prioritize your private life over your work life – when there’s a baby on the way, for example, or if you’re moving house, or having to take care of a sick parent.
“Rather than having a very strict work/life-balance, you should aim for the flexibility to prioritize one over the other depending on what the situation asks of you,” says Thijs Launspach, a psychologist, TEDx and keynote speaker and author of Crazy Busy: Keeping Sane in a Stressful World.
“To your team, you should lead by example,” Launspach explains. “Don’t pretend that you’re a super hero at work and outside of work. Be open about your own challenges in managing stress.”
Launspach advises telling your team members that they shouldn’t aim to avoid work-related stress as they couldn’t even if they wanted to. Instead, they should try to manage stress in a healthy way – by including plenty of recovery time between stressful periods.
5. Adopt a “Life First, Always” policy
“Pressure to perform can take a toll on even the most resilient of us,” says Mimi Nicklin, founder of ad agency Freedm and author of Softening the Edge. “With the load unlikely to lighten, try working towards a ‘life first’ mindset to prioritize wellbeing, non-work related passions, and family within our ‘always on’ working world and not apart from it. This feels like a far more achievable goal and that becomes motivating unto itself.”
According to Nicklin, a “life first” mindset means recognizing that your personal life and professional life are interconnected and that success in one area can, and must, positively impact another.
6. Love yourself, warts and all
“It is impossible to genuinely connect with another human being if you are not being authentic,” says Yetunde Hofmann, a portfolio non-executive director, author of Beyond Engagement and founder of the Solaris Executive Leadership Development Academy. “And you cannot be authentic if you are putting on a mask at work and pretending to be a different person to who you are at home. Every domain of our life is interrelated: how you think affects how you relate – at home and at work.”
According to Hofmann, leaders must trust themselves to be who they genuinely are, regardless of context. “Leaders need to love themselves and come from a place of self-acceptance, warts and all,” she says. “In self-acceptance comes self-care, understanding, knowledge and awareness. This then allows you to give yourself permission to bring all of who you are to every situation in which you find yourself.”
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